Wednesday, September 28, 2011

OH HEY

If you like hearing me talk endlessly about Disney, I'm working on a project wherein I talk about every Disney Animation Studios feature film.

You can find it right here!

40 Disney Attractions: 31

"I almost bounced clear out of the ride!"



31. The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh

Following the success of 1977's Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh movie, the Imagineers at Disneyland thought it would be a good idea to make a ride out of the chubby little cubby's exploits in the soon-to-be revamped Fantasyland in Anaheim. Finally, when Fantasyland reopened in 1983, there it was: no ride. In fact it would take another 16 years before a Pooh Bear ride would be created. Oddly, the Disney World Fantasyland(where the ride was first opened) had enough space for a couple more attractions, yet they instead chose to replace an existing attraction: Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

But we're not talking about that ride yet! It's fatty's time to shine. A general dark ride, Winnie the Pooh takes guests in a hunny pot through Pooh's meta-storybook world. Despite its title promising Many Adventures, it mainly focuses on the events which unfold on a particularly blustery Windsday in the Hundred Acre Wood. Driving past scenes of chaos like Piglet hanging onto a broom for dear life and Kanga trying to keep Roo from flying away, the pot heads deeper into the woods before getting ambushed by Tigger, who invites you to bounce with him. Which, of course, your pot proceeds to do along the track until you come upon Tigger pounced atop Pooh Bear, telling him all about the dangers of Heffalumps and Woozles.

What proceeds is a probably my favorite part of the ride. As Pooh Bear dreams of the hunny-stealing creatures(with a ghostly version of his body lifting into the sky, thanks to Pepper's Ghost), the doors open into a bizarre blacklighted bastarized funhouse. 2-Dimensional Heffalumps and Woozles dance around, Jack-in-the-Box Woozles pop out of their boxes and a giant Heffalump blows smoke rings right in your face from his trunk. Exiting through a water can pouring rain over a hunny pot, the scene turns into a flooded Hundred Acre Wood, with thunder and lightning going off in the background. As everyone tries to rescue Piglet from floating away, the ride vehicle itself floats around(a move achieved by having the vehicle move in all directions at a steady speed). In the final scene, everyone is enjoying a party in celebration of the end of the flood. Everyone, that is, with the exception of Pooh, who has happily stumbled upon a huge hunny stash next to the end of the ride.

As lame as it is that Mr. Toad is no more, Pooh is, personally, a welcome replacement. It's cute and fun and that's what should matter. A lot of people get really mad when things are replaced by other things, but the parks were always meant to be constantly changing so that it would never be dated. Just because you liked a ride as a kid, doesn't mean it should remain that way. The park isn't meant to just cater to you or your kid or any other one individual. It's for everyone.

So quit your complaining, you chump!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

40 Disney Attractions: 32

"Roger Simba One"



32. Kilimanjaro Safaris

Salamu and welcome to Africa! Once a Dutch settlement, the small East African village of Harambe became self-governing entity following a peaceful revolution in 1963. Since then, much of Harambe has been devoted to protecting and learning of the wildlife in the area. Tourists and students both travel to Harambe to view observe Africa's animals in their naural habitats via both the Pangani Forest Exploration Trail and the Harambe Wildlife Preserve, where they can tour the area thanks to the Kilimanjaro Safari Tours.

Arranged by Preserve warden Wilson Matua, the two-week safari tour allows guests to safely explore the Ituri forest, Safi River valley and Serengeti Savana, among others. Aboard the Simba One(simba is swahili for lion, you jerks), guests are offered a look at a number of native creatures, among them lions, elephants and zebras. While there's a few dangerous moments, mainly driving on a rickety bridge over crocodile infested waters, the tour goes fairly smoothly. At least until Matua spots a couple poachers lurking in the preserve. With your guide as the closest available ride to the poachers, the vehicle races to stop them from shooting mother elephant Big Red and taking her child. Will you get there in time?(Yes you will).

Even without the added factor of action, Kilimanjaro Safaris is a relaxing ride with the bonus of getting a close look at animals interacting in their natural habitat(which is why the ride closes in the late afternoon or else all the animals would just be sleepin).

40 Disney Attractions: 33

"Our journey begins as dramatic and sudden changes are sweeping over the land."



33. Living with the Land

While the east side of Epcot's Future World focuses on the technological sciences, the west side is more natural. A look at how we can live in harmony with our planet and how we can harness the power of imagination to do it. The centerpiece of this side is The Land, a two story building that houses three attractions, two restaurants and much of the entire resort's produce production facility. Less of a ride, more of a tour, Living with the Land takes you on a boat ride through that facility.

Starting in a series of setpieces depicting different climate areas, the ride explains how man and animal has been able to adapt and live within the area or modifying it to fit our purposes without harming it. Soon after, the ride opens out into the greenhouse within The Land. Here is where the park's "living laboratory" resides, exploring the future of agriculture. All the plants are grown using hydroponics(the plants are grown in sand, perlite, coconut coir and rockwood).

While the majority of areas seem like regular greenhouses, most have something special about them. The Aquacell practices safe fish farming, housing high and low-denisty tanks and tubes to store everything from shrimp to alligator to bass. The String Greenhouse focuses on a number of innovative techniques, such as Nutrient film, which recycles plant nutrients for the plants themselves, and "vertical growing" which is exactly what it sounds like.

Before departing the ride, the boat takes you through the Creative Greenhouse, which explores future ways to make and preserve plants and vegetables. All plants here are grown via Aeroponics, which suspend the plant in the air and spray the (sometimes exposed) roots with a mist of water and nutrients. Also housed in this area is the biotechnology labs of the living laboratory, where several USDA scientists reside to research crop improvement, as well as a pest management lab which handles a number of beneficial insects used to deal with pests that would be harmful to the plants.

Disney is known for its seriousness in keeping the visage of the park intact, making sure characters don't walk in the wrong areas or maintenance can't be seen. Heck, that's the entire reason the Magic Kingdom has the underground Utilidoors, to take cast members from one side of the park to the other without being seen. What makes Living with the Land so cool and special is that this is the closest to a backstage pass most of us will really get.

40 Disney Attractions: 34

"Did he just say 'action'?"



34. Studio Backlot Tour

Hollywood Studios is dedicated to the Hollywood of old. Not the one in California, but the one in our minds. A Hollywood where the streets are paved with gold and the famous never grow old, a place that never was, yet always will be.

Originally the Disney-MGM Studios, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer allowed their name to be used and helped fund the park until they realized Disney were violating their contract by building a working studio in the park and they sued with Disney filing a countersuit due to MGM opening a theme park in Vegas. A judge eventually decided that both were allowed to do what they want and it wasn't until 2008 that Disney changed its name to Disney's Hollywood Studios.

Like a movie studio, the park has multiple areas that blend into each other as a mass of streets. It can sometimes be a bit confusing to traverse but it's easy to get used to. The other real con is a lot of the attractions are spaced out/are shows, so there aren't too many rides around the park, leaving it sometimes feeling a little empty. Like, most parks might take a whole day or more to really explore, but this one feels like half a day. Luckily, most of the rides here are worth the visit.

Fittingly located in the one area that really looks like the other side of the studio, the Studio Backlot Tour is exactly what it sounds like: a tram ride through the backlot area of the studio, beginning at first in a standing show area based around special effects(explained by a pre-taped Michael Bay). Filming the fictional "Harbor Attack," a couple "special volunteers"(usually found by asking guests at the entrance if they'd like to skip the line) are put in the place of stuntmen and are rocked by explosions and doused in water(one unlucky guest in the "engine room" is overcome by a massive deluge of water), before the scenes are put together, with the final result being shown to the audience. After a brief queue through a prop room, the tram ride really begins.

The tram takes you through a number of sights, among them the Earful Tower(a water tower that used to be the park's symbol), the costumes building and a vehicle boneyard featuring everything from Herbie the Love Bug to Judge Doom's steamroller to the escape pod from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. The tour climaxes at a movie set that is currently being used for filming, but the crew is on break right now so it's no big d if we check it out. Too bad Catastrophe Canyon begins filming during the tram's stop. Suddenly the whole area shakes, the fuel truck EXPLODES IN A MASSIVE FIREBALL and the whole canyon floods, with the tram at the end of the flood's path. Just because you didn't participate in Harbor Attack doesn't mean you get out of getting soaked.

Following the big finish, the tram goes around the set and explains how this movie magic was made(it involves water and fire). Tram moves towards the end and you can walk through a building and look at an AFI gallery of the greatest movie villains(look it's the Alien costume oh boyyyyy) and that's it. Tram end. It's probably the closest thing to a Universal-style "behind the scenes" thing in the park.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

40 Disney Attractions: 35

"I tend to get hungry after a couple billion years"



35. Ellen's Energy Adventure

Initially a serious film with a short interlude of riding through a scene of robot dinosaurs, the whole thing got turned around in the mid-90's. Gone was the serious film, replaced by a film where Ellen Degeneres, after having a discussion about energy with her neighbor Bill Nye(wha), falls asleep while watching an old rival compete on Jeopardy. Since this a bizarre sitcom world where no one locks their doors and Ellen Degeneres lives next door to Bill Nye, she subsequently dreams about being on an energy-themed episode of Jeopardy against Albert Einstein and rival Judy Peterson(played by Jamie Lee Curtis). The dream, quite predictably, turns into a nightmare in the first round since Ellen knows jack about energy, so Bill Nye takes Ellen to the beginning of time and shows her just How Important Energy Is.

At the point the whole theater moves into the "Moving Theater" portion. After a segment where Bill and Ellen literally see the Big Bang, they're suddenly in the middle of a prehistoric jungle. That's where the animatronic dinos come into play. So the moving theaters turn around and travel through a couple scenes with dinosaurs. These dinos:



These scenes are basically the same as the one from Universe of Energy, except they put in an animatronic Ellen hiding and trying to fight off said dinosaurs. That's about it. Then it's back into another damn theater, this time a caveman(Kramer) discovers fire and sets off the history of man controlling energy in a quick montage. In a very forward-thinking moment, Bill and Ellen then discuss the future of energy, among them wind and solar power(the Universe of Energy building itself was actually an innovation in solar energy as its roof is made up of around 80,000 photovoltaic solar cells that partly power the entire ride).

You can see where Ellen's dream goes from here. She returns in the second round of Jeopardy and does really well and wins. Then Ellen pretty much tells you to get the hell out.

This ride hasn't been changed since 1996.

Friday, September 9, 2011

40 Disney Attractions: 36

"C'mon, everybody. Here we goooo!"



36. Peter Pan's Flight

Fantasyland, more than any other section in the Magic Kingdom, the place where dreams come true, regardless of whether or not you wish upon a star. While Disneyland's version is modeled on an old-thyme Bavarian village, Disney World's is modeled on a renaissance Fantasie Faire, mainly out of necessity. Florida is pretty rainy a lot so there needs to be a lot of coverings to make sure the rides don't get all rained up. Currently at the Magic Kingdom, things are a little cramped, seeing as Fantasyland is going through a full-on facelift adding huge areas devoted to the princesses and adding a second Dumbo ride.

Probably the most common ride at Disney theme parks is the "dark ride". Dark rides are indoor attractions where vehicles travel through specially-lit scenes containing music, sound, animation, etc.

Peter Pan's Flight is a fairly traditional dark ride with one caveat. It's the only dark ride with a suspended ride vehicle. Instead of traveling on an Omnimover track on the floor, the vehicles(modeled after the flying galleon at the end of the film) travel with an overhead thingy to "simulate" """"flight""". From there though, it's pretty straightforward. You travel through all the big scenes from Peter Pan: Pete arriving in the Darling home, flying over London, the sword fight, all that good stuff.

The thing that always confused me is how popular the dang thing is. Wait times can go up to over an hour, even if it feels shorter thanks to the efficient Omnimover system. It's a normal, short dark ride and yet people go nuts over it? Maybe that's not it, maybe it's just that it's a super quick ride and it gives folks something to do before they go eat a burger at Liberty Tree Tavern(located adjacent to beautiful Gracey Manor). Who knows?

More importantly, who cares. It's fun.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

40 Disney Attractions: 37

"Expedition Everest team members should proceed to the loading platform."



37. Expedition Everest

Disney's Animal Kingdom is just as the name implies. It's an animal kingdom, of both the modern and ancient, real and mythical. You can come face to face with the largest beasts to roam the earth or get shrunk to the tiniest bug. Animal Kingdom is a world of animals in their natural habitats(theme parks) with us as tourists in their land. In terms of the other parks, it is the most natural of the resort. Here, vast expanses of land do their best to simulate each animal's most familiar surroundings and the park also dedicates much of its time to conservation and animal protection. You know how all the other parks have fireworks shows? Animal Kingdom doesn't haven't that because it would make the animals freak out.

Much like the World Showcase, Animal Kingdom uses real places(for the most part) as the starting off point of its attractions. Here, Africa and today's article Asia are given the fantasy backstory treatment. Animal Kingdom's Asia takes visitors to the peaceful, and fictional, kingdom of Anandapur(which translates to "place of delight" in Sanskrit). The village of Anandapur was formerly part of a much larger kingdom ruled over by many kind maharajahs before destruction of the land whittled the kingdom down to two small villages, Anandapur and Serka Zong, located at the base of the Himalayas. Since then, many of the residents have devoted their time to conservation efforts and the study of native animal life.

In Serka Zong, an expedition team has set up shop to scale Mount Everest. However, the train up to the mountain must first pass through the town's legendary "forbidden mountain," said by locals to be the home of the mythical yeti. As you wind through the queue, you explore the village's local wildlife museum, with a large section devoted to the yeti itself. Upon reaching and entering the train, it winds around a path(with a little drop) before heading into the mountains. Here, a temple devoted to the yeti has been ransacked and murals warn the rider of the fictional beast. Making it near the top of the mountain, the train grinds to a halt. The track ahead of it has been torn up, presumably by some animal. No worries, the train begins a backwards trek on a different track, spiraling backwards down the mountain before heading back up on another path.

But soon enough, the track comes to a halt again, this time inside a huge cave. The illuminated cave wall shows the shadow of a massive creature tearing up more track before it notices something and runs off. The train moves away again, carefully traveling further down another track, until that track turns out to go the wrong way. Soon enough, you're plunging 80 feet down, banking left and right and spiraling around mountains and as you plummet you fall through another cave and you see him.



The yeti is real. He swipes at you, trying to derail the train once more, but you escape to safety. Finally reaching the base, your train docks and you unload, those myths and legends proved true.

Despite its immense size(it's not only the tallest thing in the entire Walt Disney World resort, it would also be the second tallest summit in Florida if it were a real mountain) and somewhat imposing nature, it is commonly billed as a family thrill ride. In other words, for all its flash and ambience(which is very nice, though), it's somewhat tame. Strange for a ride starring a monstrous yeti.